Hi, I’m Austin Washington. In addition to writing “the best book ever written” about my great uncle George, I’m an astonishingly well-paid author. Sort of. It depends how you look at it.
I was first contracted to write The Education of George Washington when I was still in school. They asked me how much I wanted as an advance. I closed my eyes, screwed up my nerve, and thought of the biggest number I could think of.
It was a small publisher, but I later found out I could easily have got, say, $25,000.00. I’d just never thought that big before. And they weren’t going to tell me they’d give me more. Should have had an agent. Oh well…
Worse yet, they only gave me 50% of it (they rest would come later, when I turned in the finished book.)
So I gambled it. I bought some bitcoin.
Did I mention this was back in 2010? When bitcoin was…$0.008. (No, not eight cents. Slightly less than 1¢.)
I sold some of my bitcoin when it had risen to the princely sum of 10¢ per bitcoin. But I sold some, when it had risen to the more astonishing sum of $2900/bitcoin. (And a lot in between.)
Had I invested the entire $5,000.00 at the very lowest price, and sold it all at the highest price, I’d now be worth about $15,000,000,000 (15 billion dollars.)
Of course no one is that smart or lucky.
But I am a millionaire.
Are you? Not yet?
So here you are, and you need some barcodes. Here is how the right decision now could turn your barcode into a billion dollars.
What are Barcodes, and Why are They Needed?
Why Getting Barcodes from Us Could Also Make You Rich
There is a lot of confusion about barcodes, UPC and EAN numbers, what you need, and how to get it.
Of course we’ll solve this problem for you. But for you this should just be a minor detail. After all, you’re selling a product. You have dream, and you want to succeed. You don’t just need a barcode. And we don’t have just barcodes.
So we’re offering something more.
We’ll take care of the barcodes. But also, if you get your barcode from us, and if you ask, we’ll consider funding or otherwise helping with some aspect of your current product/project, or any future product or project you may have (but of course if you just want to buy your barcodes and get nothing else, that’s fine, too).
You see, we don’t own over a hundred thousand barcodes because the tooth fairy gave them to us. We own them because, like you, we are entrepreneurs. But we’re not entrepreneurs with a hundred thousand products, so we don’t need all our barcodes.
We are entrepreneurs with several million dollars. And we are actively looking for new partnerships.
Currently, we’ve partially funded over thirty businesses and entrepreneurs, of various sizes. You probably wouldn’t be too surprised at how many unsolicited requests we get every day, from people with dreams, wanting us to fund them. Too many to look at, not enough hours in a day.
But you’re different. You have a product, that you’re ready to sell. You just need one final thing, the UPC number (or EAN), and its associated barcode, and you’re ready for the marketplace.
So, you’re already head and shoulders above most of your so-called competitors. You’re not dreaming, blindly writing letters and making proposals without taking the first step yourself. You have (a) product(s), it’s (they’re) ready for sale, and, almost like magic*, we’ve found each other.
*actually, probably more due to our clever marketing department, which of course you can utilise, too, if we partner together.
So, now you’re testing us, and we’re testing you. Maybe you really do just want a barcode, or a few barcodes. That’s fine. We’re here to help. (But still, you never know where things may lead.)
We won’t pry, you can just take your barcodes and be on the way.
But if you want to fill out a little extra information on our form below, we’ll be glad to take a look.
This way, everybody’s self-screened, which makes our lives easier. Again, if you just want your barcode(s) and nothing else, that’s fine. But if you want a bit more, money, support, marketing help, maybe something will develop.
Here is a little history of Barcodes, UPC Numbers, and EAN Numbers
Once upon a time…
Too much. We’ll skip to recent history.
Back when we bought our 100,000 barcodes, you could have done the same thing. But then GS1 decided it could make more money by leasing barcodes.
Quick Clarity Check: Barcodes are those, um, bar-codey looking pictures, like this. They are just a drawing that allows a machine to read a number.
Easy Simplification: Our GS1 UPC numbers work anywhere in the world, as both “EAN” and “UPC”. (An EAN is a UPC with a digit added to the beginning. Not rocket science. The digit we use is “1”. In the olden days, “1” referred to America—nice how we always put ourselves first, just like with phone codes—America’s international number phone code is also 1). However, today, this doesn’t matter anymore. We, and others, use our numbers all over the world, in both their UPC and EAN format.)
So, if you had purchased 100,000 barcodes back when we did, you’d be golden.
If you had purchased several thousand bitcoins in 2010, you’d also be golden.
But you didn’t. We did.
So here we are, and want to help you succeed, not so that we get richer, more because it’s fun. We like watching Shark Tank, and The Profit. We want to do the same thing. Don’t you? I mean, we’re serious. We just do it for joy now.
Would you like to be in our shoes? Read on. Or just buy your codes from us, now.
WARNING: WHATEVER YOU DO DON’T GET YOUR BARCODES FROM GS1
It’s not just that you’ll be on a subscription forever with them, but what if you forget to pay one year? Then all your products, all your accumulated reviews, everything goes kaput. It’s all gone. And the minimum purchase from GS1 is thousands of dollars.
What if you product has a long tail? You’d be paying more for barcodes than any profits you otherwise would be getting.
Whatever you do, buy, don’t rent, your UPC/EAN/Barcodes. Some “re-sellers” only rent them, too, so, caveat emptor and all that.
Is it legal?
Why, yes. All of this has actually been adjudicated by a court in Washington, and decided in our favor (in the favor of any re-seller, in fact.) We have the right to sell barcodes, and because we are the original owners, your products and barcodes will be officially registered on all appropriate registries, while your numbers are directly on GS1’s database, which points to our database which points to you and your product.
Simple, efficient, clean and clear. With the extra chance of becoming partners with us and/or our marketing team.
FAQ REGARDING OUR UPC EAN NUMBERS/BARCODES
Where can they be used?
Anywhere humans exist and money changes hands. From USA, Canada, UK, to the Outer Hebrides, Antarctica, and beyond. Really, anywhere.
Ebay, Amazon, online marketplaces, offline marketplaces. Anywhere and everywhere.
What is the best place to get them?
We feel we are the best place, because in addition to being officially registered with GS1, yet mathematically infinitely cheaper (we charge you once, GS1 charges you forever, so at least in theory, GS1 charges you ∞) we’ll also only hold your hand and walk you through the process, and might even end up helping you with marketing or even investing in your product/project. You perhaps need to make money, we like to make money. But we can still help each other.